Lets welcome the New Year

2012 was the year of the apocalypse when the whole world was going to go down in flames. Thankfully for us, the Mayans were wrong with their predictions and here we are, celebrating the dawn of a new year. 2013 is finally here. 2012 may have been an amazing year in terms of travelling and finding out who my true friends are, but this following year is what is going to be rather crucial for me and several of those I hold dear.

The year where I finally graduate and become an Engineer by right. A year where I may have to face the harsh truths of the "real world" and stay my ground. The year which may cause dreams to be shattered and others to be formed. A year where decisions will have to be made. But I'm praying that just like the year that has gone by, the coming year will be filled with people I love and care and those who love me just as much. A year that will be filled with new friends and companions who will remain with me for the rest of  my life. People who will never truly leave my side even though the worst may come and stay there once the worst is gone.

New beginnings are all that people ever dream about, a chance to right ones wrongs, a chance to be someone they believe themselves to be capable of- that ideal self. So well, lets bid goodbye to a year that has been kind and been filled with memories that will never die and say hello to a year filled with promise and  hope.

Happy New Year everybody, I hope you'll have a satisfying and precious year ahead.


Lots of Love

Twilight: The love story

I expect a lot of hate for this, but it's my honest opinion that Twilight is actually a decent love story. Yes, it has silly aspects of sparkling vampires and the majority of hatred it has received over the internet is the ridiculous fan girl craze it has sparked and the movie franchise just made it worse (primarily due to the acting involved). But this doesn't necessarily have to translate into hatred for the series itself.

 The human representation of anything supernatural, be it vampires, werewolves or even zombies, has always been romanticized. Authors have either portrayed them as monsters or as creatures worth our love. If you strip the series of the sparkling vampires and the towering werewolves, you have a girl trying to find herself and finding true love. The supernatural element just makes the books stand apart from the crowd and that is exact what Stephenie Meyer seems to be trying to achieve.

As we go through the books, we read about Bella growing as a person, finding and losing love and in the end, she has her happy ending. Isn't that what everyone person wants? To be able to find that one person you would do anything for even if it means risking your life many times over? That's the notion of true love that has been drilled into us from when we are young children and is fuelled by the media and society. The Twilight series just reinstates this notion.

What the fans seem to be mad about isn't the fact that it's a love story between a vampire and a girl. No, there are plenty of those stories to go around. It's the fact that despite everything, despite all the odds, these two people always seem to find each other and have a Happily Ever After.

And well, maybe having a bunch of actors who could act and eliminating the sparkly vampires may have helped in the process of making it more likeable :P

Movie Review- The Rise of the Guardians

It's been a while since I last watched a movie in the theatres, but this was a celebratory movie to commemorate the end of my exams.

When I first watched the trailer for Rise of the Guardians, I had a great deal of expectation. It held great promise and with a star studded cast- Hugh Jackman, Isla Fisher, Chris Pine, Alec Baldwin and Jude Law, one would expect this movie to be a great success and I would say that I liked the movie, but it didn't really meet my expectations.

<< Spoilers ahead >>

The story is one of a boy (Jack Frost) who is given a second chance at life by the Man in the Moon after dying whilst saving his sister and sets out to find his "centre" and be recognized. He gets this opportunity in the form of being chosen to be part of an elite group called the Guardians which comprises of Santa/North, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy and Sandman. These guardians were chosen by the Man in the Moon to help the children of the world have faith, keep them safe from the evil lurking under their bed. Their powers rely entirely on the children believing in them and keeping the legend going. Enter the villain- Pitch Black who has been ignored for a very long time and now sets out to seek revenge in the form of destroying the happiness of the children of the world by poisoning their dreams and getting rid of the Guardian's powers. He seems to succeed too. As the story progresses, Jack begins to realize how important it is to protect the children and finds his centre- fun and towards the end, he gets initiated into the Guardians.

Now, the concept was pretty nice and touching. Jack is like a teenager who is forced to take on a more mature role but eventually makes peace with it and adds his own elements to the role he is given. There are touching scenes where we realize that he is chosen as a potential guardian and given a second shot at life because he saved his sister in an ice skating accident by making it seem like fun when danger was staring him in the face. There are scenes between Jack and the other characters which make them seem so human. There is also a lovely scene in the end where the kid comes up to Jack and asks him whether he is leaving him and Jack replies saying "When the Moon comes up, do you think the Sun is gone?" further saying that he'll always be there to protect them from the "Boogeyman" aka Pitch. These scenes will remind the child in you that there'll always be someone protecting you even if you don't see them.

There is a message there to adults too, don't get so involved in your work that you actually forget all about the reason you're doing that work. It comes in the form of Jack asking the Guardians when they last interacted with the kids that they protect and they realize that it's been quite a while.He shows them the fun there is in being out there in the field instead of just managing the entire operation from wherever they are. The action and fight sequences throughout the movie are pretty awesome and the animation is impeccable as always. But sadly, although there were all these amazing elements, they just seemed too much to take in and well, the Man in the Moon was a little strange. Moreover, some scenes just make you wonder what exactly the story writer was thinking.

Maybe if you leave the cynical side of yourself and just walk in to the theatre expecting your inner child to be awakened and delighted, you'd love the movie. Plus, you get to see the bad ass side of Santa Claus a few weeks before Christmas, so be Nice :P 

The changing face of parenting in India

Recently, I came across a TV program related to the booming economy of India. With the rich getting richer and the burgeoning middle class trying to reach the levels of the rich, people are leading way more stressful lives today than they were a few years ago. The average middle class Indian works almost 6 days a week and around 12 hours a day, the weekend gets severely shortened and so does the time a regular parent spends with their child.

As a kid, I looked forward to the weekends as quality time spent at home with my parents. My mom would make the best food for us and my dad would take us out to the lake/park  near the house to spend some time with us. I'm guessing that in a way they enjoyed the time they spent with us too. 

 But in today's world there are 24 hour "day" care centres which allows parents to not only leave their children during the day, that is, the time when they work, but also at night. Many parents leave their children over at these "day" cares because they are too tired to deal with the demands of their children, especially after meeting the demands of their bosses and seniors at work. It makes sense on a level where you realize that parents are human beings too who are being taxed. In a world where both parents work 9 to 5 jobs such day care centres seem welcome, but at the same time, I wonder whether it is actually the right thing to do.

What would we do if the lights went off?

Recently, I started watching a TV series called Revolution. The storyline is fascinating yet at the same time thought provoking. The series starts off with a simple incident (which turns out to be so very complicated)- the power going off. Out of the blue, the electricity that we all depend so very much on just vanishes! Cars don't work, the lights won't turn on, even the cell phones stop working.

We're not told anything about what happened and why exactly the lights go off except that there was a start up which was working on an eco-friendly energy system development and something caused their research to result in powering off the lights. It makes you wonder what sort of technological advance would be needed to actually recreate this on such a large scale! But I deviate, the show makes you wonder what life would be like if we just lost all the electricity. Although it's purely drama and through the show characters lose their lives and anarchy hails supreme, what would we do if the lights went off?

Would we go back to living the way we did pre Industrial revolution or would we not be able to continue living because of our primal instincts to kill and survive? There surely will be those clamouring for power and trying to make the most of the situation and eventually I guess we will live in some peace. No distractions for one. I wouldn't be using a cell phone to talk to someone else when one of my friends is sitting right in front of me; I'd start walking more and possibly lose a few extra kilos, I'd actually go out and meet new people rather than chatting with them on the internet. But maybe I'm being a little too optimistic. Maybe none of that would actually happen and like the series shows, the world will be ruled by one major power and we'd all be subjected to a militia which reigns supreme.

Satyamev Jayate

This Sunday, I sat in front of my TV and realized with a heaviness in my heart that there was almost no point of it. Satyamev Jayate, Aamir Khan's latest venture on StarPlus was the one show me and my family would devotedly watch every Sunday at 11am. It was a time to share opinions about issues which plague modern day India, a time to reflect on the state of our beloved country, a time to hope and a time to bring change.

Aamir Khan has done Indian society a huge favour by bringing this show on air! He has not only tackled issues which are holding our great country back, but also instilled in us a hope and a fire to bring about the change that would probably make our nation even greater! Topics which would have seemed taboo at one point of time, such as child abuse, female foeticide, the abuse of Indian women have been discussed openly on prime time television. Issues which have existed since the dawn of our Independence were tackled and opinions were shared on topics such as dowry, caste discrimination, water pollution. Issues we may have never even dreamed of such as the poor care of our elders, our healthcare system, our food(!) were brought up and I must say that I was shocked to see how many issues we have in our country.

During the promotions of the show, Aamir Khan said "dil pe lagegi, tab hi baat banegi" (a point is made, only when it strikes home), and how right he was. Every episode played on the audiences heartstrings. Seeing the plight of the victims of child abuse or female abuse were moving and disturbing. Seeing the discrimination of people in "modern" India was repulsive and thought provoking. Every episode, brought to mind the various hurdles we need to cross to reach the heights that our forefathers dreamed of. And with each episode, came  a flicker of light which showed that not all hope was lost. There are still people who care enough about the welfare of the society to actually care to make a change.

There has never been a time during the airing of Satyamev Jayate where Aamir Khan made his audience feel at a loss of hope, he has always managed to end the show with a knowledge that someone out there is doing something about it, we just need to lend a helping hand. Be it through cash deposits to these institutions and individuals who were making a change or promoting us to take the lead and make the change, there was never a time I felt that we were in deep trouble. The last episode was particularly heartwarming. Aamir Khan brought us individuals who made a change to the society even through a myriad of hardships. Through each person, we realized that the change can start with one person and that is the power of one!

Satyamev Jayate may or may not be renewed for a second season, but all I know is that change is coming and we, the people need to bring it! 

Old friends

No matter how old you are, meeting friends you may have known ,even back in primary school is always the best experience you can have. It's the perfect opportunity for you to realize what sort of person you were back in the days when they knew you. You get to reflect upon in what ways you  have changed, and for all you know, the change may have been for the better. A chance to see how you have grown as a person or remained unchanged. But there are a range of friends you could meet to see this change. 

Friends you were very close to are always fun to meet. You can reminisce the crazy things you did, laugh at your stupidity back in the day, get emotional over shared memories. You can do any of these just hanging out in a cafe or eating in some posh restaurant you were so fond of.  Then, there is always that one group of friends you don't bother being changed around, it feels as if you'd never left them at all. You revert to being the same type of person you were when you were with them. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad, but for me, meeting that group of people always makes me feel content and younger! 

There are the friends you may have not been particularly fond of, may actually grow on you. All the things that you might have found annoying or irritating about them may have changed and you could laugh about the feelings you had towards each other. These "friends" are those who make you realize what sort of person they thought you were, and well, most of the time, they make you feel really good that you turned out the way you did.

And then, there is that one friend who you'll never forget, the one you were just yourself about, the one you would never want leaving you. The one friend who you know will always be there to catch you when you fall. The person who'd never leave you behind, even if you torture them. This friend, I would like to call my best friend. Meeting this person makes you feel special and loved, like you're the one person who's done something right in life. Meeting this best friend can change you and move you in ways that you may have never imagined and when the time comes to say goodbye, you find yourself unable to do so, your eyes mist up and you realize how special or blessed you are to have someone like them in your life. 

Bengaluru Calling: Shopping :D

A city which is cold even in the middle of summer, where jackets are needed even whilst travelling on foot in the mid of day, that is where my family lives. Bengaluru, better known as Bangalore is possibly one of the best cities in India.

Despite the visible poverty, there has been such a rapid growth in the city which has changed the landscape so quickly. So many shopping centres, buildings and skyscrapers now dominate the skyline of the city which was once filled with the greenery of trees. Although there are still parts of Bangalore ( I like the old name of the city better) which remain green, the dominating feature of the city are the various buildings scattered all over the city. Being a person who is more of a tourist than a resident in the city, I got to take in a lot of the sights in a different perspective than my aunt who's lived in Bangalore for the past 15 years. What strikes me the most about Bangalore is no longer its greenery or its parks, it is the sudden burgeoning of the malls. The shopaholic in me must have a look at these fascinating buildings which have replaced the street side shopping experience to a great extent.

The malls which have popped up all over the city incorporate the modernity the metropolitan is said to exude with a tradition Indian touch. This blend is unique to India, but is also specially designed for the fashion conscious youngsters. The malls, like every other spread all around the world endorses international brands such as Dolce and Gabanna and Levis whilst still sporting Indian brands such as Soch and Westside.

People flock in the hundreds to try on the various clothes and accessories that each shop offers. Shoppers spend no more than 5 minutes looking at a certain piece, if something attracts them, they grab it at amazing speeds. Almost everything seems affordable to the tourist in me, but as an Indian, my aunt knows what's price worthy. As we walk along the mall, I notice how similar it's infrastructure is to one of the malls back home and how very thoughtfully each shop has been placed. Free wifi throughout the mall also prompts the IT savvy crowd to hold a smartphone in one hand and a shopping bag(s) in the other. I'm actually shocked at how they're avoiding walking into each other. The malls are huge, but nothing beats the experience of actually shopping on the streets of Bangalore.

 So the next day, we set out to the well known Commerical Street, best known for the shops which decorate both sides of the road. Street side shopping is an experience which is on the polar opposite of the malls, no longer are there Airconditioned shops playing smooth music, this Street is a world of its own. Shopping in the open for accessories which would easily have costed thrice the price in a mall is an experience that very few can truly appreciate. To my aunt it is very common place to haggle for a price. Bargaining, as it is called, is not really my strong suit. My aunt negotiated prices to an extent I would have never even thought of. Further down the street are the more sophisticated looking buildings which house the local designers such as Desire and many other handicraft shops. The designers are quite unique in their own style and their art is much appreciated (in terms of the money I spent). My aunt and I stopped for a break at a popular "chaat" store which has been around for the past 100 years and tasting the delicious paani puris they sold, got me hooked. We must have had three plates of different chaats and I was still left wanting for more (although my stomach was almost full). As we walked along the road, I noticed the heat was no longer bothering me, Commercial Street had taken me into a world of its own where the shoppers don't feel the heat or the annoying flies around but are so lost in the shopping experience, that it doesn't make a difference whether you're in a branded store or just another vendor's little shop. And the best thing about shopping on the streets is that you never notice the time flying by or the money :P.

My aunt and I on Commercial Street

By the end of the second day in Bangalore, I already had my arms full of shopping bags, each from a different shop in Commercial Street. The smile on my face was proof that nothing can beat the street shopping experience and the best thing was, it was just the beginning.

Thank God for progress?

A few days ago when we were on our way back from a nearby mall, with dad in the drivers seat, my parents were discussing about how different life was in the early 80s and how it has changed over the years. My dad moved from Chennai to Bangalore at a very young age and was narrating how 6 of them (his parents and 3 other siblings) lived in a three Bedroom house with a small kitchen and an outdoor toilet. He told us how they'd get clothes only once or twice a year. Their parents would buy a long length of cloth and get a local tailor to stitch the same outfits for my father's siblings as well as his cousins. This was apparently a common thing to do those days. Even though they belonged to the middle class which was growing even back then, the family was very careful to buy things within a certain limit. My dad was given pens which he would lose on a regular basis, so to make up for the lost pens, they would use the remaining parts of older pens to form functional pens. (Recycling was popular, even back then :P).

They would travel by foot or by public buses to various places around the city. My dad recalled the difficulties of living in the 80s and despite the difficulty, there was a simplicity in life. Everyone in the colony lived together as a family, sharing happiness and sorrow. Every door was open to the children of the houses who would come in and share the food that was being eaten. They'd play, fight and have a wonderful time with each other. They had to go to the libraries and meticulously read through several books for hours at end before they found the information they were looking for. They would write letters to each other to keep in touch, even phone calls would be rare. My mother had a very similar experience, with ration shops which would as the name suggests ration out commodities to the head of the family to support the family for a month, which had to further rationed to ensure that there were no shortages. "Transistors" (Radio) was a rare luxury which only one person was allowed to control.

Transistors of the 80s

As dad narrated the story, me and my brother reacted in very similar ways, we were both shocked and at the same time we were stunned at the way they lived. We both knew that things had changed in the past two decades, but to hear a first hand account of the life we never experienced was intriguing yet baffling. We lived a life of luxury in comparison to our parents. Today, we have the Internet which does everything for us, be it a search for the materials we need for a project or just our entertainment. Each of us in the family has our own tablet or laptop which allows us to access the net whenever we please. We now have a three bedroom apartment for four people, a swimming pool at our disposal, a fully equipped gym and a breathtaking view of the city. Moreover, we have so many other resources at our disposal, that the younger version of my parents may not have even dreamed of. The progress that we've made is shocking. We're still a part of the burgeoning middle class, so much has changed in 20 years that it seems almost incomprehensible.The life we live is so much different, so much easier, but the ease and the resources have led to a sharper competition for almost everything ranging from education to sports. Now you need to chase everything you want. Despite the luxuries we have in life, has progress really changed us for the better? Very few people can trust their neighbours any more these days, very few of us leave our doors open in fear that someone would walk in and steal our possessions. We live in perpetual fear that something is going to happen to us.

So that leaves me wondering, despite all the positive aspects of progress, is it actually all that good?

Movie Review: Snow White and the Huntsman

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?".

A twist on the 1930s Disney classic, Snow White and the Huntsman brings to life the original Grimm storyline it was based on. Snow White ( Kristen Stewart) is a strong princess whose demure nature and innocence doesn't fail to charm the audience. Her strong will to take back the kingdom that should have rightfully been hers as well as her love for all things alive (including giant, ugly trolls) is quite impressive. We also get the background of her family that we were never exposed to in the Disney version of the movie. Surprisingly, Kristen Stewart suits the role of Snow White, with a wider range of emotion than she exhibited in the Twilight saga. However, I think it was unfair to place her as a more beautiful woman compared to the gorgeous Evil Queen (Charlize Theron).

The movie even brings in a deeper insight of the Evil Queen aka Ravenna- the reason she became the person she is, her relationship with her brother (which seems rather incestuous) as well as her hatred for Snow. Her obsession with her beauty and her magical powers match the characteristic traits of the evil, power hungry step mother that she is supposed to be in the original fairy tale. However, one can't help but feel bad for her after getting to know her background and her one line caught me off guard "Once upon a time I would have given my heart to you, and you would've broken it for sure". It makes the viewer ponder about the past relationships that made her the person she is. Charlize Theron plays the role of Ravenna so brilliantly well and her beauty is overwhelming on the big screen. It's not only the queen, we even get to know about the Huntsman (Chris Hemsworth), a man who was of no consequence in the earlier rendition of the fairy tale. Who ever thought that he'd be the charming Prince who sets the princess free of the curse the queen places on her. The representation of the dwarves was fascinating, with them seeming entirely unique from each other, having some depth about them and seeming like the type of people who shouldn't be trifled with.

The movie's special effects were particularly amazing. Almost every scene was surreal, ranging from the castle in which the Queen lives, to the depths of the Dark Forest, to the beach on which the final war takes place. What took my breath away was the Sanctuary, the home of the faeries where Snow discovers the extent of her magical abilities. The presence of the monarchy in the movie not only makes it historic but also fairy tale like. It brings back the belief in true love's kiss as well as other virtues that the fairy tales imbibed in us. In the end it's the innocence and strong will that wins over evil and manipulative.

The movie revolves around common themes of obsession around ones beauty, the will to get what is rightfully yours and prioritizing your responsibilities over the more trivial things in life, which makes it so much more relatable. The movie is definitely worth a watch and  probably one of the better movies of the summer. 

Snakes and ladders

One thing I remember about my childhood is playing games. We'd play games ranging from hide and seek to chasing each other. We'd spend a majority of our time outdoors till our parents would call us in or chide us for staying out too late. If we weren't outside, we'd be watching the television or we'd be playing games like Monopoly or Ludo. But the best game of all was Snakes and ladders, it was the one game I always cherished although I wasn't too great at it.

A game of pure luck, ones progress in the game was purely dependent on where the roll of a dice took you. A single play would take you up the ladder, just move ahead or get bitten by those vicious looking snakes. It would always frustrate me to be bitten by those annoying snakes, but the thrill from climbing those ladders would always be worth it. My childhood was filled with games of snakes and ladders. I never really liked those intellectual games like chess. I guess in a way, I preferred playing with my luck rather than challenge my mind over a chess board. As I grew up, the board game became a thing of the past. Gone were the days when we would throw the die and move our pieces along a board. New games started popping up and so did the computer and my snakes and ladder board collected dust in some corner of my house.

This summer, thanks to my grandmother, my mom went out and bought a new board and for the first time in over 6 years, I rolled that dice and re-entered the world of snakes and ladders. The same thrills of climbing the ladder, the disappointment when I went over a snake which took me down a lot of steps. But what made the adventure even more thrilling was playing it with my mother and grandmother. Three generations of women from my family sitting on a single bed in an air conditioned room, throwing the dice and shrieking as we went up the ladder or down the snake. I felt like a kid again, relying completely on that dice to get me to the 100th step. Laughing heartily the three of us rolled the dice over and over again, either going ahead or going back to where we started. Having luck on her side, my grandmother was the first to reach the top. It was down to me and my mother, and after having the bad luck of stepping of the 99th step (which has a snake which takes you down to the 30th step) twice, for which I cussed and shrieked at my bad luck for, my mom finally took the second place. But how we laughed, how we bonded.

Despite having lost miserably, I realized that no matter how grown up one is, there's always that child hidden inside a person, no matter how deep within. Sometimes in our lives are so filled with the tension of competition, expectation and the workload of the modern world, we forget that there's that child within us. We run along with the complexities of life and fail to enjoy the little things. We put on fake smiles, act differently and try to impress people with our maturity and individuality. But we forget that there are times when we need to give up all the worries we have in life, be it as short as a few minutes, just enjoy the fact that we are alive and do the things we truly enjoy doing.

 Just give the kid inside some room to breathe and for all you know, you'd love life even more :)

Movie review: Men In Black III

Time travel is such a well known theme and its been used so often in science fiction that we stop caring eventually, but MIBIII takes it to a whole new level. Engaging, stupendous and hilarious, courtesy of Will Smith, the movie wraps you into its own little world for about 106 minutes.

In the past two movies, Agent K has always been viewed as an anal and self righteous person who depicts a strange and misplaced sense of humor and a very narrow range of emotion, but in this movie, we get to see him in an all new avatar. Not only is he funny and charming, he is also so full of emotion that just like Agent J, I kept asking "What the hell happened to you man?". His affair with Agent O (the future head of the MIB organization) is so adorable and the fact that he discusses it so openly with J makes him more human than he's ever been shown to be. His reactions to the events that occur towards the end were so touching and made me love K all the more.

Agent J (Will Smith) never for one moment turned it down a notch with his comedic timing. Be it the anti racist comments or the snide remarks he makes to the people he inflicts the neuralyzer. He's so lovable and at the same time, I was moved by his performance towards the end when he has his moment of discovery. J's attachment to his reticent partner makes him all the more precious because not only does he time travel, he becomes the friend that K always seems to have needed. I was left feeling a little sad for him yet at the same time, I was so proud of him for having the guts to do the time he believed was right.

Possibly my favourite character in this movie was Griffin the Arkanian. He has alien abilities to predict a wide range of possible futures. He is entirely adorable and it's amusing to see him mull over the possibilities. He reminded me of an elf from Santa Claus' workshops. His pure innocence and truthful nature blew me away, yet at the same time, he's clever and calculating.  The screenwriters sure did a good job in giving him all the good and memorable lines. Also, hats off to Michael Stuhlbarg who played this role, his delivery of the lines suited the character so well, it seemed like he was made just to play the role of Griffin. He made me believe in miracles again with that one line he said seeming completely doped "A miracle is something that seems impossible, but happens anyway".

The movie's villain, Boris "the animal" was also hilarious, yet at the same time frightening. He has his blonde moments and sometimes I thought the director just enjoyed making him look silly.  His vengeful nature along with the fact that his past self is so full of himself, makes him strangely human, although the arachnid friend of his which crawls right into his hand makes him spookily other worldly. Nicole Scherzinger disappoints with her role as Boris' slutty girlfriend who's let go on the moon as Boris makes his dramatic escape.

Overall, I found the movie really good! The special effects were brilliantly done and the action sequences were well choreographed. Not only did I enjoy the movie, my 76 year old grandmother found the movie equally amusing. Moreover, there was an actual storyline which could be followed. Call it a blast from the past, but this sequel seemed to be as good as the original. 

Bollywood obsession

Bollywood is probably one of India's leading passions with almost every child knowing about the booming film industry. Possibly one of the world's largest film industry,it produces over 200 hundred films a year.  These movies have been around since the early 20th century and they vary in genre- from romances to action packed movies. The industry has churned out super stars and billionaires who have even shot to international acclaim. Not only is Bollywood known all over India, the world has been left spellbound by the magic surrounding these movies.

Our film actors and actresses are our idols.  As a child, I wanted to be like my favourite actress, I pretended to be her and  put on the attitude she used to have. As I grew up, I realized I couldn't be like her, I could only be like the characters she played and good golly did she play them very well. What we don't realize we have to do is separate our film stars from the characters they play and the people they actually are. It is a well known fact that we adore them, that some of us really want to know what is going on in their lives, which is why the paparazzi in India are so active and so well paid; but what we don't  realize is that they are people too. We place them on a pedestal so high that when we see them fall, it breaks our hearts. If a hero who plays well behaved and the boy next door roles, exhibits foul behaviour on one occasion, we pounce on them and tear them apart. It takes a public apology or time to heal that wound, but it generally almost always heals. Another issue with this glorification is that when one hero falls, another is ready to grab the pedestal and thus begins another giant fan following. But what is most disturbing is our obsession with the way our film stars look, the recent media outrage on Aishwarya Rai Bachchan's weight gain post pregnancy was shocking and eye opening at the same time. The number of nay sayers were ridiculous insisting that she take example from Hollywood moms but there were the loyal fans who shot down such remarks saying that she was a mother who was enjoying time with her child. Such outrages aren't uncommon, but the stars have to go through a lot just to be in the spot light. How does one escape? Escape seems almost impossible. Even retired film stars come into the spotlight once in a while, so once you're part of the family, it doesn't seem like you can ever leave.

Movies are made by the hundreds each year, but each year only a few make it to the box office. What I love about Bollywood the most, is the fact that even with so many movies which are released, there are those few movies which one can never tire of. These classics are ones that can't be forgotten and that one can never give up watching. No matter what, Bollywood is my ultimate favorite :) 

Mothers

The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness.  ~Honoré de Balzac 

The various quotes which exist about mothers is just about enough to tell you what a mother means to the world. She is the woman who bears you for the duration of almost a year, gives birth to you, tolerating all the pain of the labour to hold the precious infant version of you in her arms and coo at you. The woman who held you when you cried, gave up her sleep to make sure you went back to sleep. The woman who watched you walk your first steps and catch you when you fell. She laughed when you laughed and her heart broke when you cried. She listened to your problems when you were growing up and tried to solve them, but if she couldn't, she'd always give you the best advice you could have hoped for ("Mom knows best"). You'd fight with her, yell at her, but in the end, you'd come back to her.

 Over the years, she must've made so many sacrifices that you've never noticed, or as Tenneva Jordan puts it "A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie". She's seen you grow up from a child who babbled, to someone who could take the stage and talk to a hall full of people. She's possibly had to give up a career to take care of you, but I bet she'd never complain. We all love our mothers and possibly some of us even want to be like our mothers. But in this process of viewing her as a mother- the caretaker, the nurturer, the problem solver; we lose sight of our mothers as women. In accepting our mothers are our mothers, we forget that they're more than just that, they are wives, daughters, granddaughters, daughter in laws, friends and maybe even working professionals. 

The responsibilities of a woman after marriage (especially after bearing a child) seem overwhelming. Not only are you a daughter to your parents, you are a wife to your husband, a daughter in law to your husbands' parents and a mother to your child. And what of your career? How does a woman manage to balance her working life with the responsibilities of being a mother? What are the sacrifices it takes to maintain a balance between all aspects of yourself?  There are women out there who balance all these aspects. They are a mother, the perfect wife, the perfect daughter/daughter in law and a professional  who is looked up to in their work place. My mother is one of those women, the one who's always been there for my entire family and also managed to make a name for herself in her workplace. I'm glad to have always had my mother's love and look forward to one day, being like her.. 

After all, mommies are just big little girls :)

Siblings

My younger brother is probably my worst nightmare come true. He troubles me endlessly and angers me like no one else. Despite all that, he is the Ying to my Yang, and possibly the best friend I could have ever asked for.

Born just a few years after I was, my earliest memories of him are causing the trolley he was sitting in to topple over and my parents fussing over the injuries he didn't have. I was always the apple of everyone's eyes, being the first daughter born into the family; but my brother stole the limelight as a baby. I must say, I don't recall being too fond of him, but early photos suggest that I loved him dearly. There are pictures of me holding him in that baby blanket of his and us sharing toys. Sometimes I think my parents staged those pictures, but at other times I think perhaps I truly did love my brother even then. We were barely in the same circles growing up. My brother had his set of friends and I had mine. My best friend adored him and she still does. His friends look up to me occasionally.

As we grew up, we realized we had to have each others' back. We shared secrets, told each other about almost everything that happened. A transparency formed between us and I started understanding my brother better.  He was no longer the little brat of the family, but a boy on the cusp of adulthood trying to deal with a lot of things. I was trying to figure out how to help him best and possibly get my own life together. We helped each other grow back together and that strengthened our bond.

 Despite our love for each other, there always was a sense of sibling rivalry, which I believe is essential in every relationship. The need to outdo the other in different fields is what has kept me and my brother from falling into total madness. The counterweight to the love we have for each other is the amount we fight and argue with each other. To an outsider, our fights might seem too serious and proof of how much we hate each other, but we reconcile almost immediately. Eventually, we've both found our niche, things we are good at that the other isn't. He can cook, whilst I can write. He can sing, whilst I can dance.

We may be different people, but in the end we are siblings. No matter what arguments we have, or what disagreements we may have; we will always have each other and that's what counts. 

Monkey Bars

Possibly one of the few things many of us remember from our childhood is playing in an open garden or a park. When I was a child, we had two parks in our neighborhood. Each had its own unique design and its own different swing set collection and a jungle gym which was difficult to maneuver. What they both had in common were the monkey bars. In both parks, there were always kids who would be hanging from these bars, either trying to get taller at the insistence of their parents or just showing off to their friends that they could cross over to the other end.

Me and my friends would compete to go across the monkey bars. In fact, we would all have a race to see who could get to the other side the fastest.s Unlike many of my friends, I would never be able to complete it. Despite being able to get across every other obstacle in the complicated jungle gym, the monkey bars always stumped me. I would always fall off somewhere around the middle and then try my best to get across it again. But eventually I would give up and be teased by my friends for my inability to go across. As we grew up, different things took priority, like who'd get the best grades or who'd end up with the best looking boyfriend/girlfriend and the monkey bar slowly slipped into the background.

This summer, I'm back in the playground watching kids of varied age groups trying to cross that monkey bar. One particular child caught my attention. Although I'm uncertain for how long she's been trying, she kept her varied attempts at scrambling across the monkey bars trying to make her way across, but she kept falling. This child's determination to actually make it past these treacherous bars was shocking. She kept at it for almost half an hour, not focusing on anything else and finally after repeated falls, she picked herself up and made it across to the other side. She laughed and repeated the act a couple more times before she left the playground. It surprised me that she picked herself up despite falling over and over again and was so determined to make it across. What happens to us as we grow up? Why does that determination to go across that monkey bar fade away? Why is it that we give up so easily when by repeatedly going at it, we can actually succeed. I know there are people in this world who strive to get what they want, but there is still a majority of people who give up without even a second try.

What I've recalled from these monkey bars- never take no for an answer and don't give up. No matter what obstacle you face, no matter how dire, try a different angle and keep working on it. Eventually, the obstacle won't seem as big as it did initially. 

Memoirs of an Army Wife

Memories are fascinating treasures which . They  shape us, change us, make us who we are and even drive us towards goals. But what makes them so special is that they are ours and ours alone.  But memories fade. They can be changed by a slight loss or gain of knowledge, an accidental loss of consciousness or a disease which causes people to forget who they are. Dementia is a commonly faced problem by a large population of the aged. The effects of this condition range from short term memory loss to a complete loss of memory.

This post is dedicated to the woman who gave birth to and raised my mother. The woman who made sacrifices for her family and a woman who always prioritized her family. My grandmother.

My grandma was born in the year 1935, prior to India's independence in Thiruvarur, a district in Tamil Nadu. The second of 8 children in the family and the first born girl, my grandmother was brought up with a great deal of love and affection by her parents. Her father, was the rail master of the district and her mother a regular Brahmin housewife. Brought up in a rather large house, she would spend her free time  playing in the nearby garden with the children of the local Englishmen. She attended the All Ladies school which was a walk down the street from her and was always surrounded with friends. She excelled in her studies, especially in Hindi, a subject she would go to tuition for and ace the exams. By the time she had completed her education, she had reached a level where she could have easily been accepted into any prestigious college in the state. But, due to financial constraints and her parents having to fund the education of her younger siblings, she had to give up her education and began her own tutoring classes which attracted a great deal of students.

By the time she was 23, she was married to a high ranking officer of the Indian Army, one who had fought in the Sino Indian War. Due to her husband's involvement in the army, my grandmother along with her in laws had to move from one state to another. 3 years into the marriage, she was still not with child and there were taunts from my grandfather's family. But after a visit to one of the holy rivers, she was pregnant with her first child, a son who was born in 1966. Soon after she gave birth to two beautiful daughters, my mother being one of them. As she traveled from city to city, her children enjoyed a variety of company and she would entertain guests- wives of other army officials. They would sit down and sip on tea and talk about a range of topics. There were periods of times when my grandfather would be placed in a region where there were no family quarters. My grandmother was never afraid, she was brave and took care of her children at these times. Her son followed in the footsteps of his father and joined the Indian Army as well. Her daughters both became teachers.

As her children grew up, marriages were arranged and soon she gave away her daughters to different families and her son continued his work in the army. She lived with my grandfather who had retired from the army and led a peaceful life with her father in law and husband. However, her husband passed away in a few years time and she was left with a majority of responsibilities. Her children would drop by from time to time to help her with household chores, but she never gave up her routine. She would visit the temple every Thursday and everyday she would take care of her aged father in law. She'd cook and clean the house, but eventually, she was left alone.

Slowly yet certainly, her memory fades. There are those occasional flashes of memory, but someone needs to be with her to trigger them and remind her over and over again that she's not alone.

To be continued..... 

Grandparents

I lost both grandfathers at a very young age. I don't think I recall my paternal grandfather, save that he used to throw me beautiful birthday parties when I was a child and that he saved me from punishments when I was a child. My maternal grandfather I knew better, because he came home with us and spent several months entertaining me and my younger brother. Each time we visited India without my father, we would stay at my mother's house and my grandpa would narrate stories of his days in the army and he would take us to the temple and sing for hours at end. His loss was felt more strongly because I remember seeing my mom cry and leave the country and then not being allowed to go to the funeral.

My grandmothers, I have known better. My paternal grandmother is a disciplined woman who's been an amazing mother to my dad and his three siblings. She's been an amazing grandmother to me and my cousins too, always feeding us whatever we wanted, giving us chocolates and even fussing over my hair and the way I looked. Although sometimes I get annoyed at her, I know I'll always love her and that she'll always love me.
My maternal grandmother, on the other hand is a silent woman who has taken care of her family almost all her life. She's never said a word against her children and she's kept a majority of her feelings to herself. She lives alone in a house which has been around for several decades, she's been moved around from one city to another due to my grandfather's army placements. She seems to many like a strong and independent woman, but how old does one have to get to show the world that she isn't?

I've never really had time to interact with my grandmothers in the past, but this summer, I've had plenty of time to interact with my maternal grandmother who's come home with us. Her memory is fading, slowly and I'm here to help her remember the things she's forgetting. To make sure that she remembers who I am, who she is, what she's experienced in life. And to some extent, it's actually helping.

Never taking ones grandparents for granted is possibly one of the most important thing a grandchild can do. Even if they are a few generations older than you, they have valuable insight that you may never get from anyone else. 

Nothing else feels like home

This summer, I finally decided to take a break. After being in university for 3 years, I have been home from time to time, but I've never stayed for longer than a month. This time around, I'm home for three long months. The decision was made due to a variety of reasons, but possibly the one which tilted the balance the most, was that I missed being home.

University life is hectic and stressful! That is a fact most people would agree with me on. It provides many with the wings to explore new avenues and be independent, but frankly, I would much rather be home, be pampered and just relax rather than having to work all day to get ahead of the competitive life that one experiences in university. Yes, my social life may be reduced a bit, but I definitely wouldn't mind spending all the time with my family instead.

The past two summers have been spent at the university, so I'm very open for any change in the way I spend my summer and Home sweet home is one place that never lets me down :)